6 Simple Tweaks That Will Lead To Better Sex

We all get stuck in a sex rut from time to time. Whether it’s getting repetitive or you just aren’t feeling particularly sensual, great sex (you know, the kind that leaves you wanting to do it again and again) can sometimes seem like a tall order. The good news is, you don’t have to go to great lengths to make your time in the bedroom better.

No? Absolutely not. In fact, we spoke to sex expert Dr Nikki Goldstein on her simple tips for spicing up your sex life…

Tips for having better sex…

#1 Take a turn on top

Does the idea of being on top intimidate you? Trust us, you’re not alone.

In fact, according to Dr Goldstein, “a lot of women prefer to be submissive” in the bedroom. But being on top doesn’t have to mean you’ve assumed total control if you don’t want to. After all, it takes two to tango.

Power dynamics aside, many women have expressed that they worry about how they might look from this position. If you’re asking Dr Goldstein, however? “You don’t look that pretty [from any angle],” she says. Whether or not that makes you feel better, we’re unsure.

If you’re asking our opinion, you look spectacular from every angle and your partner certainly agrees!

#2 Use the right toy

While experimenting with sex toys can be lots of fun, Dr Goldstein says “it’s important to consider what you’re using and why”. Are you after clitoral stimulation? Try the We-Vibe Melt ($189.99 at Wild Secrets).

Or perhaps it’s a fun foreplay game that you can use as a couple. If that’s the case, we can vouch for the Lovehoney Position Of The Week Cards ($19.95 at Lovehoney).

#3 Make safe sex sexy

Using protection is a must to prevent unwanted pregnancy and STIs, but instead of viewing them as a necessary nuisance, Dr Goldstein suggests using it as an opportunity to have a little fun.

From ribbing to glow-in-the-dark varieties, there are plenty of exciting condoms around. Need a little inspiration? Well, our expert recommends trying to master the art of “putting on a condom using your mouth”. Now that’s a challenge.

#4 Enjoy foreplay

It doesn’t always have to be about the big O. Move the focus away from the end goal and instead, enjoy the lead up.

One great way to build sexual tension is with a massage. Find a deliciously scented body oil like Weleda’s Arnica Massage Oil ($29.95 at Woolworths) (which is formulated to warm up the muscles, preparing them for ‘high-energy performance’) add in the plusOne Mini Massager ($29.99 at plusOne) and get to work.

#5 Laugh more

Having a giggle might seem impossible with everything else going on, but laughter leads to a better time between the sheets. As Dr Goldstein explains, “[laughter] increases heart rate and blood flow – much like sex”. So it’s in your best interest to loosen up.

Embarrassing things are bound to happen in the bedroom (fanny farts, anyone?), but seeing the funny side may turn your blunders into turn-ons.

#6 Focus on how you feel

Here’s a fact: feeling sexy is conducive to having a spicier experience in the bedroom. To help you banish your body woes, check out our tips on how to look (and feel) sexy naked. Once you begin to feel amazing, you can focus on actually enjoying yourself (minus the niggling, intrusive thoughts about things like body hair or cellulite). When it comes to attire, Dr Goldstein says not to “focus on what they like”. Instead, think about what you feel sexiest wearing – and if it ain’t a lacy negligee, so be it. 

Do you have any good tips for spicing up your sex life?