9 things all tanaholics know to be true

If you can’t go two weeks without tanning, own at least three varieties of self-tan (mousse, cream and spray) and have given up on buying white linen – you’re a tanaholic. As a fellow bronzed goddess (when I’m not embracing my inner pale girl), I’d like to welcome you to the club with a few things only those who regularly faux tan can relate to.

#1 Thursday night is tanning night

Because then you’re bronzed and ready to go for the weekend and you can wash your sheets on Sunday, the day of rest. Der. Any plans on a Thursday night have to be done and dusted early, so you can get home in time to exfoliate, shower and slather on a layer (or two) of fake tan before bed.

#2 Sometimes you wish you had a boyfriend, just so he could tan your back 

Honestly, it would make life so much easier. No matter how hard you try to reach that spot on the top of your back, there’s always a white triangle-shaped area that remains ghostly white.

Although the most seasoned tanners know about this nifty trick:

#3 Tanning shaves off ten kilos

Why do you think Lo-Fi is such a popular Instagram filter? Because the contrast is high, making everyone look tan and thinner. And I’d rather tan than go to the gym any day of the week.

#4 Bras are bad

Nothing ruins a tan faster than putting on a bra before it’s fully developed and washed off. The looser the clothing, the better. Which brings us back to why Thursday night is officially ‘tanning night’, not Saturday morning. Who wants to run errands or head to brunch braless?

#5 A #flawless tan comes down to the prep

A perfectly non-patchy tan is all about the preparation. Seasoned tanners will always remove body hair, exfoliate, add a moisture barrier to the elbows and knees, and tie their hair up nice and high before getting the mitt out.

The ultimate self-tanning prep kit:

1. Gilette Venus Embrace Sensitive Razor
2. SunFX Exfoliating Glove 
3. Redwin Sorbolene Moisturiser
4. Lady Jayne Super Hold Elastics

#6 Double check the toilet seat

When nature calls while your tan is still developing, it’s crucial to give the toilet seat the once over. Because when humidity, tan and white toilet seats meet, the results can truly be shocking for the next user – unless cleaned up immediately. 

#7 Sex is a no-no

Unless you want to end up with white finger marks on your back and thighs, it’s not worth it. Plus, getting hot and steamy in the sheets will only make the tan transfer onto your linen worse.

#8 Use a foundation brush for small areas

Pro tanners will never have obvious tan lines on their hands, thanks to this bit of know-how. Use a foundation brush to apply your face tan and then use the same brush to do the areas between your fingers and the back of your hands to make sure the transition from the wrist is untraceable. The same goes for your feet.

#9 Fake tan smells good 

Some people hate the smell of fake tan, but not the true lovers. To us, it smells like victory against the perils of pale skin.

At-home fake tans we love

Rimmel London Sun Shimmer Self Tan Mousse 
pureTAN Instant Foaming Tan
Salon Tan Foaming Mousse
Jbronze Dark Tanning Cream
St. Tropez Self Tan Bronzing Mousse
Sunescape Hydrating Self-Tan Mousse

Are you a tanaholic? Do you relate to any of the above?